The Story vs. The Teller

Hey, everybody. It's me again, legal Queen LA A k a, Ashly Valenzuela. And happy July. We finally made it to the middle of the summer, even though, uh, California decided to cancel the summer. Um, hopefully as we keep talking about these, these positive stories and being positive in our energy, the sunshine will come back with us. But today, I'm super, super excited. We have a very special guest, um, who I had the pleasure of meeting at the United Talent Agency, Hollywood and Minds Mental Health Summit that I spoke about on episode one. Today we have Miss Brandy Menefee, and she's gonna tell us everything we need to know about. Hi, Welcome. Happy to be here. I'm so happy that you are here. Um, again, we met at the mental health, uh, Hollywood and Mind Summit, and we had the pleasure of learning about, um, everything from how AI can be used in mental health, um, producers being helpful with using therapy, and, um, helping with actors using, you know, different techniques on set. Uh, we learned about Demi Lovato's story. Mm-hmm. um, which was really nice. We listened to a couple of, uh, artists storytelling through their music. Um, but what is it exactly? What is one your title and what exactly does that mean? Um, well, let's see. As a mental health storyteller, I specialize in sensitive subject matter. So I'm the person hired to interview people about their trauma, their addiction, their grief, their tough times, their, their struggles, how they've coped in healthy ways and unhealthy ways, how they got from bad to better. So I've worked, I've worked as a producer, director, and editor. Um, my whole life, my career has, um, has been working behind the scenes in documentary content. So as a mental health storyteller, I've worked on, like, I worked on a war series for Nat Geo, and I interviewed, um, you know, you United States military veterans Wow. About their most traumatic days in combat and their struggles with reentry. And then we presented those stories in the series. Um, I've worked with trauma survivors, um, victims of kidnapping and, uh, sex trafficking and their hostage negotiators. Wow. Um, for a true crime series. Um, grieving families, mourning communities, um, couples dealing with miscarriage for reality shows, um, you name it. So it's really about, um, interviewing people about their mental disorders, navigating, um, their diagnoses, how that's impacted their lives, whatever somebody has struggled with. I just, I call it pain and pain management. Right. And sharing our stories of like, this is how my, uh, this is my story. This is how my depression or anxiety, or whatever. Ha this is what it looks like, sounds like, feels like for me. And that could be survival stories. Um, uh, to me, mental health storytelling, everything's mental health storytelling. Right? Absolutely. Because stories are about, you have a protagonist who is trying, you know, who has a challenge and is trying to overcome that challenge. Uh, you know, there's a spectrum, right? So no matter if that's, uh, a really severe mental illness or just some symptoms that are showing up one day because you're feeling overwhelmed and stressed, it's, it's those and everything in between. Wow. So essentially it is your job to take these terrible things, um, that we've gone through and put them onto a screen, um, for the world to see. Um, that sounds like one, a really hard job to do, but also probably really rewarding. Super, super rewarding. I mean, I didn't, uh, I didn't, you know, years ago I didn't decide like, this is what I'm going to do. Right. It just kind of happened. So my work in, in documentary content has been everything from Snoop Dogg's murder trial to the Selena Gomez, my Mind and Me documentary. And, uh, and when I was really looking at my career, I saw a thread. And, you know, I've worked wi in music programming. I've worked with chefs in food. I've worked in adventure programming with like, storm chasers, all real people, real life, true stories. But I saw this thread and I realized that whenever it had to do with really sensitive subject matter and, you know, tough times and creating a warm, safe space for people to open up about their pain, how they coped, um, you know, their traumas, their triggers, their churning points, every single one of those projects, I really was in my element and I really, you know, um, felt like it was the most rewarding work. And so, um, and so that's why I've decided the last few years I need to focus on this 100% of the time and not just have it be like sporadic jobs. Absolutely. It needs to be every job. I love that. Um, now being that you are the storyteller and, you know, you're not used to being in this seat in front of this camera, um, getting interviewed, uh, what is a little bit of your story that you're comfortable telling us that led you to want to do this for other people? Well, I, um, I've kind of always been that person who people just naturally opened up to. Mm-hmm. , I don't really know what it is. I believe that about you, I do. Um, but like, you know, a few months back I was at a convention with my fiance and, uh, a friend of his came up to him and, um, and he introduced us, and then my fiance excused himself to like, go use the restroom. And I probably spent maybe five minutes talking to his friend, you know, who I was just meeting for the first time. And then the friend was like, okay, great, nice to meet you. And, and he walked away . And then my fiance came back and he was like, oh, you know how, you know, how was that? And I was like, oh, that was great. Except, you know, it's really a shame. What's, what's going on, you know, with him and his, his, uh, his daughter, you know, and his family situation, and your fiance. Fiance. And my fiance was like, no idea. What are you talking about? I was like, wow, you just met him. Like, how did that happen? And that's sort of, that's how it's always been for me. I don't know, people like to, um, seem to open up or share or, uh, you know, want to confess their secrets. And so, um, I feel like that's been a huge value on any of the TV shows or projects that I've worked on. Oh, yeah. But it hasn't been a conscious thing, like, I'm gonna go out and do this. It just sort of happens. And so I, um, and then I, what I love about it is you, I love creating a warm, safe space for people to open up. And I love that you get to feel somebody, it's like loosening the, the valve just a little bit mm-hmm. , right? And so after someone shares, you know, they walk away feeling a little bit lighter, you know? Yeah. It's just one more step in the healing process. It's kinda like a therapy session for sure. It is. But, you know, I've had people who said, oh, that's the first time that I, you know, shared my suicidal ideations with somebody other than a therapist. Wow. And it felt different, and it felt great. And so I love making that space and talking to people about, um, stuff and asking them questions that, you know, that they don't normally get asked. You know, because most of us avoid talking about, or bringing, oh, yeah. Bring, bringing, oh, I don't wanna bring, don't away. I don't wanna make you sad, or I don't wanna bring up like, you know, a a tough subject. And it's not like I walk around, you know, like, tell me about your trauma, you know, or like, or that's all I talk about. Like, we usually know that we're going to have, you know, some kind of conversation mm-hmm. that, you know, it doesn't just come out of the blue or I'm not gonna like, assault you, or I'm not gonna be like a buzzkill at a party. But, you know, if you have something to say that you wanna share, um, you know, I'm here for it. Like, I'm all in because, um, sharing your story helps you feel better. And then somebody else, hearing, seeing, reading your story, um, helps them a little bit. Right? Absolutely. And I think, um, you know, I've been struggling with, with writing, or I'm sorry, finishing my own book because, um, maybe I don't have the, the capacity to fully be the storyteller while I'm the story That is very, very difficult. Yeah. Like, see, you just, you asked me about my story and I didn't really, I, I didn't really go there. You know, I didn't really say, it's really hard to, um, to really paint the picture when you're part of the story. Mm. Right. Mm. And so I feel like we all need a producer or somebody, you know, a friend. It's, it's easier when somebody else kind of helps, uh, draw it, you know, draw it out of you, make you feel comfortable, ask the right questions, and, um, and help draw out the details that, um, that really are gonna make a difference. Yeah. Make a difference for you to actually speak aloud and make a difference, uh, that someone else hears, you know, that's going to identify. Like it's, you know, you can get somebody to say, I'm an alcoholic, but if you can get them to explain, I used to fill my water bottle with vodka and take it to work, That's different. That, that hits different. Right. And it's different for them to say it, and it's different. Think about the, the person out there who really needs to hear that and see themselves in that. And, um, and that's gonna be, you know, part of theirs story or their, you know, healing journey. Like, uh, to feel seen. Right. Yeah. Absolutely. Thank you. Um, that's, you know, you're making me think of all these things, uh, with within myself. Um, and we've, we've talked before the show about, you know, how difficult it can be to, I feel like you're paving the way in the film and TV industry or, or the, just the entertainment industry in general because, uh, you have such a different job title and such a different, um, area of expertise that maybe a lot of people aren't familiar with or a lot of, um, projects don't even think about needing. Um, what is it, what do you think that you would like for everybody to know about, you know, your diverse resume and why your position is so necessary? Mm. Well, I think that, um, that's a really good question, . Sorry, I know I wanna straight, It's a really good question. And I'm, you know, I'm always the interviewer. I'm never the interviewee. So, um, so it is a little bit different to like, . It's like, oh, is this what people feel like when I ask them questions? Or I don't have an answer? Like right now, yeah. Gets a little bit crazy sometimes. Sometimes I don't know what to say or what to, what to ask or even what to respond. But, um, when we were talking about this subject, we talked about, uh, not putting ourselves in boxes. And, um, one of the very first things in the pandemic when everybody was completely out of whack and didn't know who they were or what they were going to be tomorrow, um, someone told me, don't you are not defined by your career. And I was just like, well, I mean, it sounds good, but I just spent all this money on this piece of paper and I can't even get a job with this piece of paper. You know? Um, but it made me sit there and think like, okay, I'm really not just a lawyer. I'm not just, you know, whatever. So I made this little, this little Venn diagram of myself, um, and I just, you know, did it on my little, uh, notepad in my phone. But I think we talked about how important it is to not just check one box because we have so many boxes. Um, me personally, if you could read my handwriting, it's not, it's not the worst. But, you know, we have the law. I'm an attorney, of course, we have the entertainment. I am pretty entertaining if I say so myself. And then we have the social justice, which includes the mental health. And, you know, I'm very, a very heavy advocate of, you know, racial injustice, uh, homelessness, uh, child advocacy. Um, those are kind of my like three main things, um, that I like to focus on. And I feel like the reason I started this podcast is because I'm all of these things and where am I going to, where else am I going to put all of these things right now? You know? So here we are on the, in the, in the royalty room, um, talking about mental health storytelling in, um, you know, I'm sure you, you could have helped me in, in many ways with this podcast in telling my story on episode three, uh, me versus Me. Well, and I'm sure that, you know, um, your story probably goes beyond just one episode. Oh, God. You know, we all have layers and, you know, and chapters and, you know, seasons of our lives as well as our whole lifetime as far as dealing with, um, our mental health, um, you know, our pain, our different struggles. Mm-hmm. . Um, but yeah, it's, it's even when you see, right. Even when you see celebrities on the red carpet and their, we're just talking about their, uh, you know, the, their different creative roles, right? And it's like, okay, you know, you're an actor, you're a writer, and, uh, and, uh, you know, producer, and you direct, you know which one, you know, do you like the best? Or if you could only do one, or, you know, we always wanna just boil people down, down to just one thing. But none of us are just one thing. Exactly. I will never, I will never understand that. So you got me thinking about my Venn diagram, and I'm definitely all about, uh, documentary storytelling, which covers a lot. Right? Cuz that can cover, um, you know, a printed article that can cover a, a candid photo, um, uh, digital video, TV film. So I'm about documentary storytelling. I'm definitely about mental health. I really was having a hard time with the third one. And it's like, I don't know, can like mac and cheese be my third? Hell yeah. Look at me. You got me hitting the, hitting the microphone. Hell, yeah. Food is, food is a huge part of me. . I don't, I don't know about you, but mac and cheese sounds like it's pretty good. And my sister told me on Easter, the mac and cheese I made was pretty fire. I bet it was. And I, I, I need that recipe, or I need you to, you're invited to the next or something, to the next family dinner. Thank you. Thank you, don't worry but definitely, like, that's one of my, my coping mechanisms is food. I totally, I eat my feelings. Yep. And that's probably like my number one coping mechanism. I get it. Honestly, when I was in, um, when I was in law school, um, I'm definitely a stressed eater. So if you think, you know, they say the freshman 15, I think that's just rude. And I think we should leave our, um, teenagers alone with their body and their diets and however they go through life. But I'm definitely a stress eater, and the stress eating turns to binge depressed eating, and then I'm 20 to 40 pounds heavier. And I don't know how I got here because of, you know, but there's no more snacks left in the kitchen. So maybe that's how we got here. But I think, you know, as long as it's, um, one of our, our previous guests whom you met as well, kale mm-hmm. , uh, Robinson, she really drilled it into my head that it, it's not like you have to cold Turkey cut these things out, or you have to just never do these things again. It's just about what feels good. If it, if it doesn't feel good, when you take three more bites, you should probably put it down. Uh, but if it feels good and it makes you feel better, have that, you know, plate of mac and cheese or whatever. But if it, it, at the point where it doesn't feel good, feel physically, mentally, you start to feel bad about it, or guilty, maybe that's when you should, you know, close that pantry . Um, but as long as it feels good and as long as it's resonating with you, then you're free to do as you please. Well, that Cause you're grown That's right. And that's why I love talking to people about different ways of coping through tough times. Um, whether it's an afternoon or a certain chapter or, you know, or an entire lifetime because, um, because you can get inspiration from other people, right? Oh, yeah. So it's like, um, maybe there's somebody out there who doesn't know how awesome mac and cheese is that, um, somehow I can, you know, bring you a moment of relief. I wouldn't say that Mac and cheese is gonna solve any of your problems whatsoever, But it's called comfort food for a reason. You can't, you can't take that one away. Um, but coming back to your part of your Venn diagram was the documentaries. Um, what was it like, what was the experience like working with, um, the Selena Gomez documentary? I know it's a little bit different than, you know, working with some of the other things. Mm-hmm, what was that experience like? Um, or what was your favorite part or the hardest part? Um, well, you know, I went to Africa, so if you've seen, uh, Selena Gomez, my mind in me, she goes to Kenya. And, um, my favorite part of working on that documentary was going to Kenya and interviewing mental health specialists and everyday people in a big city like Nairobi. Wow. And then everyday people in really remote villages about their mental health challenges and how you, uh, how you deal with your mental health challenges when you live in a mud hut. Right. And you don't have access to resources, um, how you deal with mental cha mental health challenges when you live in a country where suicide is illegal. Wow. So there's no suicide hotlines in Kenya. Um, and I heard a story about somebody who was in so much pain and felt so trapped by their pain that they wanted to end their life, and they tried to do so and it didn't work. It failed. Right. Um, and instead of, um, instead of, you know, calling, um, you know, uh, medical team and, you know, and getting help that way, um, they were arrested Wow. And in prison now because it's, because it was illegal for them to try to, to end their life. So anyway, um, it was really fascinating talking to getting strangers to open up about, um, about their mental health challenges in, in Kenya and s and then overall working on a documentary where you can see how each time people talk about the tough stuff, whether that's Selena or the people around her, the people that she's, you know, that she encounters just everything gets a little bit lighter and a little bit brighter for all of us. Right. But it was actually, it was actually working on the Selena Gomez documentary that cemented my passion and purpose for mental health storytelling. Wow. Because I was literally sitting in a mud hut in this remote African village talking about struggle and suicide with strangers using a Swahili translator. Wow. And then that's where I saw all of my different, um, you know, jobs in production like flash before me that were like, you've been here before. You've talked to strangers about their, their struggles before and how they were able to turn a corner. And I was like, I am in my element and I'm my element. Everything's kinda in a, in alignment in a mud hut, , you know, halfway around the globe talking to complete strangers using a translator. And this feels totally, I'm totally in my lane. And so that's when I decided like, this really does need to be every job. You know, every job needs to be talking about this. And, um, and doing that on all different platforms mm-hmm. for tv, films, digital print, whatever. You know, we were at the Hollywood and Mind, um, inaugural summit, which was so cool. That was so cool. . And there were so many great panels and speakers and conversations happening. And, and essentially the, um, the message that day and the message every day is like, we need to share our stories. Yeah. The power of our personal stories. Let's share our stories so that we're normalizing having these conversations. And it doesn't have to be so hush hush, or people don't have to feel like it's like this taboo thing. Um, but what I find is that there's, with, you know, these panels and webinars and everything, we all talk about the importance of telling our stories, but then the, I kind of feel like that's where the conversation stops. No one told the story. We're like, where are we? Where we we telling stories, The stories, where are we telling the stories? That's so true. So I'm like constantly looking for like new pathways and platforms and ways to help other people share their stories, whether that's in a, you know, a big mental health, you know, uh, feature like Selena's documentary mm-hmm. or, um, you know, a mental health, nonprofit job recruitment, you know, video. Right. Or a blog or, or whatever. But it's like, I am here to help people tell their stories. And, but can we talk a little bit more about like, how, how do we do this? Yeah. You know, we talk about the importance of these stories, but how and where are we doing it? Do you know offhand, um, even probably five other folks who are doing the same task that you're doing? I, I, I thought that that would be the answer. Um, and we we're smiling and we're laughing, but that's just so upsetting. What do we, what do we do, do, do, do you start a company and, and train, train others in how to do the same thing? Because I, I will sign up. You know, that's a great question. No one's asked me that question. And, um, so that's something to really, that's something to really about think about for sure. Because when I tell people, oh, yes, you know, I specialize in mental health storytelling, everyone's all, oh my God, that's just great. Oh my gosh. You know, and thank you for the, you know, the work that you're, you're doing. But yeah. Uh, you know, I create a lot of my own work, but in seeking the, those kinds of projects, it's not that Easy. Easy. Yeah. You know, I can imagine it's, as far as having it be like a concentrated, like I want every job to be a mental health storytelling job. Mm-hmm. . So, but it may not be presented that way. Yeah. Right. It doesn't have to have, you know, a headline mental health. So like last year I worked in post-production as a story producer on a biography series, um, spotlighting women athletes. But these stories, the interviews were already shot. Right. So I was, you know, all sad that I couldn't have Right. I couldn't do them. But they were fascinating stories about how these women athletes became, uh, you know, elite athletes and the struggles that they had to overcome. And so, so much of their stories, you know, dealt with trauma and depression. Absolutely. And so I wanted to be, you know, I wanted to be part of that. So I worked as a story producer in post to help put those together. I've worked on, I worked as a story producer in post on a, on a reality show putting, because I specifically, I said, what's the main storyline this season? And they said, multiple miscarriages. Mm. I'm like, I'm in, I wanna be part of like, helping craft and present those, those stories. Yeah. So, you know, it's not like people are, are posting jobs, like this is a mental health storytelling job. Right. But it's about trying to, to, to find, you know, different ways and different stories and also trying to open people's eyes that like, isn't almost everything. Couldn't that be considered a mental health story? Yeah. Yeah. I think, um, whenever we were at the, the, uh, the summit, they had, uh, that panel of producers who are saying that they're now implementing, um, therapy in production whenever they're dealing with really hard scenes, um, or really hard movies throughout. Um, and they were saying, you know, we have licensed therapists on set to be able to talk to the, the actors and actresses. Um, I think that that's a really good step, um, that we could be moving towards. Um, For sure That, I remember the first, the first show that I watched that really kind of struck, stood out to me as mental health. And this could kind of affect viewers or this could affect the actors in there was the secret life of the American teenager. Um, and I was a teenager, I think when yeah, when this came out. And at the end of every episode was a disclaimer. You know, if someone is struggling with X, Y, and Z, here's the number. And that's the first kind of show where I noticed that aspect. You know, we're, we're caring about mental health, or we're caring about how these scenes and these, you know, teenage pregnancy could be affecting the viewers. And I thought that that was really a good, a good start. Um, and now to hear that they are having therapists and or different mental health advocates on sets, I think that that's really good as well. Um, especially for the scripted things. You know, you generally work with non-scripted, um, biographical. I do, But it's, I mean, it's important, right? That we are just, um, it's such a great time right now for mental health mm-hmm. , because, you know, even though it might feel like a buzzword at times, we're talking about it, right? Yeah. It's becoming like, you know, we're more, And I don't remember this ever before, before, before the pandemic really, I don't remember mental health being such a big topic that people like to talk about. I gotta say It's kinda more secretive. It's one of the blessings from the pandemic, because now we collectively have all experienced the pandemic and locked down, and you couldn't not be affected right. By that. Right. You know, whether you were feeling isolation or overwhelmed, depression, anxiety, whatever. So we all now know that like, at least, you know, we can talk about that. And everybody has a little bit of an understanding of like, what that looked like, sounded like, and felt like for them, you know? Um, but I think it's really, really important to have people on set, um, to help in any way possible, um, scripted or unscripted. Because, you know, I worked on a war series, um, and we were watching helmet camera footage, right? From Oh man, like, from, uh, combat veterans. And essentially the show was to, to interview, um, soldiers and Marines about the, their footage and their, their stories behind, you know, uh, their daily lives and their, um, their life at war. Right. But the staff, like, we are sitting there for, you know, 10 hours a day watching all of this footage. That's, that can be really, really hard to watch. We're, you know, we are the ones interviewing and hearing these, you know, um, uh, these really, really dark, heavy, tough details. And this job was a number of years ago, but it was only recently that someone said, how were you supported on that show? Right? Like, did your production company provide, you know, mental health support for you guys? Cuz you're dealing with, um, with all the footage and, uh, I mean, there was nothing. Of course not. I'm hoping now, if there was a war series today, um, or even like the, um, you know, the kidnapping show that I worked on, I would really hope that if we were doing those shows, you know, in 2023 and beyond that production companies would have somebody available in-house to help. Um, because, you know, that's true. It was hard. That's true. I didn't even, I, I didn't even think about it. Went straight over my head. You also need those, um, those support systems on set, you know, even with whenever you went to Kenya and you were doing those interviews, you know, that's the, that's the, the blessing of the cur and the curse of the empath, um, empath, however you may choose to say it, but, uh, I, I definitely get that because I'm usually in my family and my friend group, I'm usually the one everybody's just throwing all their stuff at for me to either untangle, fix, listen to, you know, advise, et cetera. And at the end of the day, I'm just like, Ugh, I'm exhausted. What do I do? Right. Cuz then what do you do? Where do you put all of That? Yeah. Yeah. And, um, even with watching shows, um, you know, secret Life of the American teenager, that was one thing. But then when I was in law school, uh, 13 reasons why came out and Selena was one, Selena Gomez was one of the producers. And I distinctly remember there was this one night, I don't know if it was, you know, the episode where the main character, um, gets to her story about committing suicide. But I was face down on my carpet on the floor just boohoo crying because not only was the show so sad, but I'm sad about my, uh, depression or suicidal ideations and the things that I brought up for me. And then I'm thinking about how, how are the actors okay with portraying these things? And then I'm thinking about all the viewers who are of the high school age because it was a high school show and it's really, really, really alarming. Like how triggering a fictional show can be. Um, but then I, I couldn't even imagine portraying those things. You know, I'm not in the acting world at all, but like, I think, do you think that it is important regardless to have, um, in-house therapy available on set for the documentaries and, and the scripted and all of these types of things for the actors and for yourself in your position? Definitely. Um, any support that can be provided to anybody at any time because, and I try to use that word support instead of help mm-hmm. , because I think that people are more open Yeah. To receiving support than receiving or asking for help. Right. But any time that, that, um, that you can support somebody in a professional role or personally with their mental health is crucial because it affects how you show up to work. Right. Whether that's in front of the camera or behind the camera or at a desk. Right. It affects how you show up for your friends and your family and for yourself. And ultimately, when we are feeling good, we make good decisions mm-hmm. . And when we feel bad, we do not make good decisions Or rational, small and big. Yeah. Right. So think about it, if we are all feeling good, you know, what is the world gonna look like when, you know, for the most part, like, we're feeling good, we're feeling our best, we're feeling healthy, you know, um, physically and mentally strong. We're feeling like we are, we can share, we're seen, you know? Um, we don't have to hide, we don't have to perform. I mean, the ripple effect is is incredible. I love that. I love that. Um, what do you think or what would you like to see, um, for the industry, the entertainment industry as a whole moving forward? Um, from where you are sitting? You know, I would love for us to continue telling stories about our mental health challenges and how we turned a corner and got from bad to better. Whether that's, you know, documentary storytelling or, you know, fictional, scripted stories. But they don't have to come with a mental health headline. Right. They are just stories mm-hmm. . And so I feel like everybody in the mental health space all has the insane intention, right. Which is to rebrand or redefine mental health mm-hmm. . Right. So we're seeing it differently. People say, uh, de-stigmatize and the stigma, I don't really love to use that word cuz I feel like every time we say mental health and stigma, we are just reinforcing adding to it. Yeah. That negative association. I agree. But I know what our intention is. Our intention is rebranding, redefining mental health so that when we talk about our mental health, your mental health, I ask you, it's the same as me asking you about your bad knee or your heart condition or your high cholesterol. Right. Or your eyesight or whatever. Um, so I'm just, I I'm hoping with the industry that the intention is to, to share stories about our mental health journeys, but not label them mental health. This is, this is mental health because it goes back to like putting something in a box, right? Yeah. Or just defining it as one thing. Because there's a lot of people who hear mental health and then they tune out or they like slowly back away. Right. Ugh. Because they're like, oh, okay, God, no, no, no, no, no, no. This is gonna be like heavy and dark and I don't wanna go there. Right. Or this doesn't, oh, that totally doesn't apply. Not me, to me couldn't be me. And, um, and it's like, no, no, no, it affects us all. Or it at least affects somebody that you care about and somebody that you care about is struggling and you probably don't even know it. But if we're talking about it, if we're watching shows and movies and reading articles and you have, you know, uh, entertainers talking about it and you have scripted series about it, but that it's not necessarily labeled Yeah. A mental health story, then I think that that will really, um, you know, move the needle. I agree. I, I definitely, um, with, with the boxing in of things like why do I just have to be a lawyer? Why do I just have to be, um, you know, the, the other box, I checked the other box for my race, I'm other Okay. Where you don't need to know anything else, but I do not fit in that box, that box, that box or that box. So I'm gonna check the one I do fit, which is ambiguous other, you know, and, um, it's easy to do the, the, the comedy, the romance, the drama. Um, I feel like there doesn't need to be a subsection of also, this is a drama, but it's a mental health drama. Right. Right. Why? Yeah, why do we have to do that? I mean, the thing is, it's important to categorize things for people who are seeking that mm-hmm. because there are people who, who are like, no, you know, I want to watch something, you know, in the mental health space, or I want to watch something about addiction or self-harm. Mm-hmm. , because that's been, you know, that person's experience and they wanna I, you know, identify with that. But I was talking to somebody last week at a conference and she said, you know, we have different appetites for vulnerability. And so somebody who might be, who might really, really want to watch like the Demi Lovato documentary where she is so open and honest and raw and every, every little detail, she really, really goes there. It's dark and it's deep and it's fantastic. Somebody may really, really need that and want that, but that may be way too much for somebody else who needs to kind of, you know, tiptoe into Yeah. The deep end. You know. And I feel like we're all kind of, there's no straight path for, um, anyone dealing with anything traumatic or anything from their past, whatever. Like you may today need something that heavy because you're okay to receive it, you're open to receive it and it's, it's fine today, but next week you may not be in that same space and it may be far too triggering. Um, and it could open up some, some wounds you weren't ready to open up. I'm so glad you said that cuz I really, I've, I have dealt with a lot of grieving in my life. Mm-hmm. , I've known 46 people who have died. Oh my gosh. So 46 people, I'm so sorry. Thank you. 46 people who I've known and interacted with mm-hmm. who have died. Mm-hmm. Eight of those have been suicides. Wow. Right. So with all the grieving that I've experienced in my life, I've really understood the power of the question, how are you doing today? Because with grief, same with trauma, depression, everything, it's, it's different every day. It shows up differently every day. And so, you know, just because it's been, you know, five years since, you know, the death of that person, you know, maybe it's hitting me really hard today. You know, maybe it's not, maybe the thing, maybe I don't wanna watch that thing because it's, it's gonna trigger me and I do and it doesn't trigger me. But then, you know, I, a song comes on and then I'm, you know, I'm a total wreck. No breaks. Yeah. Right. You just, you just never know. I, I agree. Um, unfortunately, um, and I, I have a very similar, um, I history with grief. Uh, it's been, it's far, far, far too many, um, instances, um, from the hometown that I come from, I actually just got back from not too long ago. And that is, it's like death, drugs and destruction is like the theme of my hometown. Oh. And, um, while I was there, I was like, there needs to be a documentary about this place. And it's, it's so, because I've been really working on myself over the last year, like, I've actually taken the time to personally and adamantly work on myself and my healing and my mental health and my peace. And I'm obviously still working cuz it's a never ending pro process. But going back and seeing the way that people think and the way that people live and the way that people talk and the way that things have been for all of these decades and years. And we wonder why you look up the town on Google and it says an American ghost town and the population continues to decline, although no one is leaving. What does that mean? We are dying? You know, so it's just, it's so much up here that I haven't even processed from just going back for a couple of days or a week and a half, whatever it was that I want to just save, save the city now. You know, and how do I do that? Telling the stories? Um, so we, we have plenty, plenty, plenty, plenty, plenty to talk about, but it's just like, it's the how are you doing? I've, I've learned to check in with myself every day. How do you feel right now? What does that mean? Because when, how do you feel good? How do you feel good? And I try to implement all these things that I've been learning out here back home, and people are just like, I'm gut, What, what else? What do you want? And I'm just like, okay, now you're yelling and now you're cussing. I just wanted you to breathe. I just wanted you to like do some deep breathing with me. That's right. That's all. And it's, it's hard to check in with others when you can't check in with yourself. Um, but how do you even check in with yourself when you never learn how to check in with yourself? Well, I really commend you for, for doing the work because it takes strength. You know, it takes courage to be able to, you know, sit with your feelings, You know, oh, it sucks. Sit with your grief. Oh, it sucks. Sit with your trauma. It is so, so, you know, painful. But that's how, you know, they say, you know, the only way out is through. Right? It's like that's how you find, you know, peace. That's how you walk a little bit lighter in this world. That's how you, you know, can really show up and, and be there for others is, is doing the work yourself. So I really commend you for doing that. Thank you. But, you know, I I, um, for mental Health Action Day this year, cuz May is Mental Health Month, um, I created a 32nd video because I was like, you know, we all, we all have people that we care about in our lives who are struggling and we have no idea. Mm-hmm. . And then we know that like mental health is like this hot topic and that we're supposed to, you know, reach out and, you know, and check on our friends, but how do we do that? Right. Or you're, you know, how do we, how do we check on our strong friends or our seemingly happy friends? Because you may not know how to start that conversation. You may not even wanna have that conversation. You may feel like you don't have the bandwidth Right. To deal Right. With whatever their answer may be. But I was like, you know what, you can like text somebody a heart, like text them an orange heart or whatever mm-hmm. , just let them know that, that you're thinking about them. Right. I care at least, you know, do something, take some action or something that, um, that can, can open that conversation if, you know, if you don't know how, just, just text somebody a heart. Right. Send some love. Yeah. I love that. Thank you. Um, I really appreciate you coming on the show first of all, but I also really appreciate you and what you do, um, for the, the entertainment industry as a whole. I think it's, it's very important that we create more of you so we can create, uh, a better, a better place and a and a happier place and a and a lighter place to get these stories out. Because as embarrassed as I may be, maybe about where I come from or what I've done or who I, who I was or whatever, or, or sad or scared or, or whatever it may be, it has to come out. Um, so thank you for everything that you're doing, um, for yourself. One, because you couldn't do it for anybody else if you weren't doing it for yourself. So thank you very much Brandy for joining us in the royalty room. And, um, thank you. Let the people know once again how to find you. Like, comment, subscribe, let us know what you want to hear next and let us know maybe any questions that you have from Brandy, because I know we covered a lot, but there's so much more to be talked about. So much more looking forward to continuing the conversation. Yes Ma'am. And what is, what is your Instagram one more time? My Instagram is Mental health storyteller. Simple. Keep it simple. So thank you again and join us back on the royalty room, uh, two Mondays from today. So thank you. Woo.